Why are you alive then?

Why are you alive then?

月白ヤトヒコ

I was summoned by my father. No, wait. When I call him "father," he glares at me with eyes full of hatred and says, "You have no right to call me father—you who took her life. It's abominable." So should I call him "Your Marquess" instead? "...Your engagement has been decided. I cannot possibly allow you, who took her life, to find happiness. But it is for the sake of the house. I cannot forgive you for being happy, much as I despise you, but marry and produce an heir." Along with his blunt words, the betrothal agreement was thrown at me. "I must respectfully decline the engagement. Or rather, I cannot accept it. I am a sinful existence, born from taking my mother's life. I intend to enter the church and offer my prayers. I have no intention of inheriting this house, so please take in an adopted child and have them inherit instead." "You—do you even understand what you're saying!? I am offering to let you, sinful as you are, inherit this house!? Be grateful!!" "No, I am fully aware of my own sinfulness. It would be unforgivable for someone like me to inherit the house. After all, isn't it what Your Marquess always says? 'Be grateful that I even let you live, you sinner.' Therefore, as a sinner, I shall go to the church to atone for my sins and pray for my mother's eternal peace." A heavy, dark story of this nature. The setting is loose. Some might find it stomach-turning. Published on Alphapolis and Kakuyomu.

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Statistics

Reading Time
43 min
Words 1,857
Sentences 199
Characters 3,475
Unique Words 565
1-Occurrence Words
341
Unique Kanji 369
1-Occurrence Kanji
175
Avg Word Difficulty 2.08
Avg Sentence Length 9.3

Word List (565 words)

WordFrequencyDifficulty
飛び出す13.50
単刀直入14.39
お手柔らかに14.81
勝手13.66
傷手14.57
一緒に12.46
誕生13.78
少々13.17
肖像画14.42
この様13.25
発来15.00
同じ12.31
詫びる14.38
釣り書き15.61
救い13.62
決まる13.10
神学校14.72
思い12.61
暫くして13.75
のに12.21
当時13.28
怖い12.81
13.31
大事12.94
13.21
んじゃ12.56
言葉通り13.92
新しく13.70
男の子13.51
調べ13.20
へと12.14
所存14.47
行動12.64
血を引く14.44
12.13
13.17
散々13.63
生かす13.68
13.45
っぽい13.06
これ12.15
冥福を祈る15.49
下がる13.19
お話し13.87
繋ぐ13.47
呼び出す13.54
跡取り14.25
たら13.78
これまで13.00
頂ける13.53
憧れる13.97
仕方なく13.79
成人13.74
という物12.99
貴族院14.07
参る13.61
おまけ13.96
眼差し13.40
酷く13.32
謂われ15.39
不足13.57
12.98
尻目14.17
穢らわしい15.58
遠縁14.85
頼むから14.23
追い詰める13.64
簡単12.68
意地13.87
養育費15.35
宜しい13.44
其れだけ12.66
こんな12.33
関係12.73
と言って12.71
始めて13.15
管理13.26
答え12.75
視線12.32
とっとと13.96
養育14.88
自分語り15.45
このまま12.79
感想13.18
物心14.35
直ぐに12.43
かなぁ13.70
それを12.10
出来12.54
じゃね14.02
12.85
心苦しい14.22
実の13.93
関係無い14.61
迎え13.35
優先13.37
その時12.75
通う13.42
と同じように13.34
愛す13.65
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